How Do You Know When to Give Up on a Relationship

  posted by: Gretchen



give up relationshipIt isn’t easy to tell when to give up on a relationship. Every relationship has its own story.  The problems of every relationship differ.  People separate ways for many reasons that we ourselves don’t even understand.  Sometimes love is not enough to make a relationship last.  It’s not enough that one of you is strong to make it work. It takes two to tango.

Breaking up is even harder for married people.  More so if you’ve been together for a long period of time.  Marriage is a sacred thing that only death can break it.  But what if it’s no longer working?  What if you don’t see any point to save it? Should you give up on your marriage?  Should you try dating someone else?

How to Tell When to Give Up on a Relationship

  • No more kindness. Kindness is essential in a healthy relationship. But if there’s no joy out of being kind to each other then this is alarming.
  • Lack of warmth and affection. If you don’t get spontaneous warmth and affection from each other and all you see is faults then something is really wrong now. For long distance relationships, expressing your affection can be done in many ways. A heart that is willing can find ways.
  • Do you enjoy the sense of humor of each other? Having fun and acting like kids together tightens your bond as lovers. But if you can’t do this with your partner then this is another sign that you have an unhealthy relationship.
  • Enjoying time together and time apart. Spending time together really plays an important role in making the relationship stronger. However, you need to give yourselves time to be with friends and other people. Your partner’s interests may not be the same with yours. Give him/her space to breath. If you can’t give this to your partner, you are suffocating him/her. This can ruin what you have and can send him/her away from you.
  • No more trust. There are instances that test our loyalty to our partner. But how do you manage it? What is the level of your trust? If you are not willing to accept the fact that your partner can hurt you in a way or another, you don’t have trust in your love.
  • Cold sexual connection. It used to be warm and caring but how about now? This is also an important factor to make a relationship healthy.
  • Lack of respect. Do you know when to apologize? Do you give the respect due to your partner? There should be correlation of respect. Respect is one of the ingredients that make up a good and healthy relationship.
  • No open communication. Do you consider your partner your best friend? Tell him/her everything. Be honest even if it hurts. If you cannot do this then something must be wrong.
  • Compatibility adjustment. Are you tired of finding solutions for compatibility issues? If you are, it’s probably time to give up.

Now have some self-reflection. There’s no formula to make a relationship work and there’s no formula to know when to give up on a relationship or on your love.  Link to God and make him the center of your relationship.  If you can still save it don’t lose hope.  Never surrender especially when you are married.  Sometimes it’s not breaking up that can solve the problems you have. May be you only need time to think things over.  But just in case you both say it’s over, try to keep the respect and friendship.


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